Quotes from “Algedonic” by r.h. Sin

a lovely savage
a delicate beast
she was a warrior
with soft skin
a vivacious brute
with victory
in her soul
and power in her veins
and yet she felt like the night
collapsing into herself
until she felt nothing
numb to the pain
that once slept in her soul
i think maybe she’s hurting
or possibly learning
to forgive herself
because in the rebuilding
of the heart
it must first be broken
in order to discover peace
you must first suffer ill emotions

you almost fully forfeit
your right to be happy
once you’ve chosen to love
someone who chooses to hurt you
from the weight
of all the sadness
in my heart

all the clouds in me
are raining

the wind whispered her name
the sky turned gray in her absence
the rain began to fall
as if to symbolize some type of sadness
it could be day
we’re afraid of monsters
but we are the monsters
and in theory
we’re all running
from ourselves
who were you before the aches
of a broken heart
who were you
before the world decided
to tear you apart

who were you
before your first love
turned hopeful to despair
who were you
before the disappointment
back when you used to care
who were you
within your innocence
before they robbed you
of your smile
who are you in this moment
you haven’t been yourself
for a while
who were you, who are you
the questions for the soul
who were you, who are you
i blame your mother
for not building
your self-esteem
and encouraging you
to be a queen
i blame your father
for not loving you enough
to keep you from
searching for a love
in men who couldn’t
love you
do you hear yourself
can you hear your own voice
over the silence
that dwells within you
the quiet vibrance
that is your soul
the brilliant chaos
that is your mind
you’ve been fighting for so long
engaging in wars that no one sees
you’ve been at war with yourself
wishing, hoping for more peace
i will see the love
and peacefulness
in living a life
without you in it
i will . . .
the girl thought to be broken
was actually healing herself
they saw sadness in her eyes
but she knew all along
that the sadness would fade
just as long as she kept fighting
so she fought
her father was the first man
to half love her
her father was the first man
to let her down
her father taught her
to love men
who would always
make her feel
as if she wasn’t good enough
her father’s version of love
was the love she accepted
from men who couldn’t
love her correctly
you are the tomorrow
that i can’t wait to get to

could we dance to the silence
could we move to the tunes
you will miss the way i missed you
and i will be fine
i can love one person
without wanting anyone else
this is my power
and this is my gift
she could be chaos
she could be peace
all depending
on how you treat her
heart is blistered
bruised the color blue
cracks from piecing myself
back together
could be day
and yet she felt like the night
collapsing into herself
until she felt nothing
numb to the pain
that once slept in her soul
we fell like rain
then drowned
like the ocean

you’re an addict
and i was just
another drug to you
but she’s the loneliest
whenever she’s beside him
on an aching heart
and so she found herself falling
for beasts who never loved her
her father never warned her
about the wolves that love to feast
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