Jeff Kinney is pretty much the nicest guy you can hope to meet. Except when it comes to his brother, Patrick. The two of them have been locked in a battle for supremacy since they were young—a war that continues to this day. A short story from the acclaimed collection Guys Read: Funny Business, edited by Jon Scieszka.
I walked out of the front door very casually and then booked to the backyard as fast as my feet would carry me. I got very close to the sliding glass door where Patrick was playing his game, and I spoke: