Prodigy

He is beauty, inside and out.

He is the silver lining in a world of darkness.

He is my light.

Sometimes you gotta love the Republic’s iron discipline.

If you want to rebel, Metias had told me, rebel from inside the system.

“Ms. Iparis,” Thomas says, putting his palms flat on the table. “We can continue like this forever, and you can just keep being snide and shaking your head until you collapse from exhaustion. I don’t want to hurt you. You have a chance to redeem yourself to the Republic. In spite of everything you’ve done, I’ve received word from my higher-ups that they still consider you to be quite valuable.”

So. Commander Jameson was involved in making sure I’m not harmed during my interrogation. “How kind,” I reply, letting sarcasm seep into my words. “I’m luckier than Metias.”

We exchange a final, parting nod. Then he gives me a polite bow, turns around, and starts walking away. “Good night, June.”

My heart is ripped open, shredded, leaking blood. I can’t let him leave like this. We’ve been through too much to turn into strangers. A farewell between us should be more than a polite bow. Suddenly I find my feet and rush toward him right as he reaches the door. “Day, wait—”

He spins around. Before I can say anything else, he steps forward and takes my face in his hands. Then he’s kissing me one last time, overwhelming me with his warmth, breathing life and love and aching sorrow into me. I throw my arms around his neck as he wraps his around my waist. My lips part for him and his mouth moves desperately against mine, devouring me, taking every breath that I have. Don’t go, I plead wordlessly. But I can taste the good-bye on his lips, and now I can no longer hold back my tears. He’s trembling. His face is wet. I hang on to him like he’ll disappear if I let go, like I’ll be left alone in this dark room, standing in the empty air. Day, the boy from the streets with nothing except the clothes on his back and the earnestness in his eyes, owns my heart.

He is beauty, inside and out.

He is the silver lining in a world of darkness.

He is my light.

After an eternity, I swallow hard. I will not cry. Love is illogical, love has consequences—I did this to myself, and I should be able to take it. So take it, June. I am the one who should be sorry. Finally, instead of saying what I want to say, I manage to wrestle down the tremor in my voice and give a more appropriate answer. What I should say.

I want to say how wrong he is, but I can’t even argue his point. Because he’s right. How could I possibly think that we’d never suffer the consequences of what I’d done to him? How could I be so arrogant to assume it would all work out for us in the end, that my doing a couple of good deeds could make up for all the pain I caused him? The truth will never change. No matter how hard he tries, every time he looks at me, he’ll see what happened to his family. He’ll see what I did. It will always haunt him; it will forever stand between us.

I need to let him go.

I can feel the tears threatening to spill from my eyes, but I don’t dare let them fall. “So,” I whisper, my voice trembling from the effort. “Is that it? After everything?” Even as I say it, I know there’s no point. The damage has already been done. There is no turning back.

Day hunches over and presses his hands against his eyes. “I’m so sorry,” he whispers.

Day can’t even look at me. “We weren’t meant to be. There are just . . . too many things that have happened.” He grows quieter. “Too many things.”

“Hear me out, June,” he says softly, holding up both hands to stop me. “I don’t know if I’ll have the guts to say all this again.” I tremble at the way his lips form my name. He gives me a smile that shatters something inside me. I don’t know why, but his expression is as if he were seeing me for the last time. “Come on, you and I both know what needs to happen. We’ve only known each other for a couple of months. But I’ve spent my entire life fighting the system that the Elector now wants to change. And you . . . well, your family suffered as much as mine did.” He pauses, and his eyes take on a faraway appearance. “I might be okay at spewing speeches from the top of a building, and at working a crowd. I don’t know anything about politics. I can only be a figurehead. But you . . . you’ve always been everything that the people need. You have the chance to change things.” He takes my hand and touches the spot on my finger where his ring used to sit. I feel the calluses on his palms, the aching gentleness of his gesture. “It’s your decision, of course, but you know what it has to be. Don’t make up your mind just because you feel guilty or something. Don’t worry about me. I know that’s why you’re holding back—I can see it on your face.”

Still, I say nothing. What is he talking about? See what on my face? What do I look like right now?

Day sighs at my silence. His face is unbearable. “June,” he says slowly. Behind his words, his voice sounds like it might break at any moment. “It will never, ever work out between us.”

“I, ah . . . have something else I should tell you too.”

I nod quietly, waiting for him to continue. Afraid of what he’ll say. Afraid he’ll explain why.

He hesitates for a long time, but when he does speak, he shakes his head and gives me a tragic little laugh. I can tell he’s changed his mind, taking a secret and folding it back into his heart. “You know, sometimes I wonder what things would be like if I just . . . met you one day. Like normal people do. If I just walked by you on some street one sunny morning and thought you were cute, stopped, shook your hand, and said, ‘Hi, I’m Daniel.’”

I close my eyes at such a sweet thought. How freeing that would be. How easy. “If only,” I whisper.