How to Be an Imperfectionist: The New Way to Self-Acceptance, Fearless Living, and Freedom from Perfectionism

The Poison of Perfectionism

“Striving for excellence motivates you; striving for perfection is demoralizing.”

~ Harriet Braiker

Perfectionists do not accept a small amount of value or progress; they only want big, smooth, perfect wins.

General and Specific Expectations

Okay, it’s not quite that simple. People have two kinds of expectations—general and specific. If you’re looking for the key takeaway now, I’ll tell you: it’s best to have high general expectations (for confidence) and low specific expectations (for resilience and confidence).

General expectations are what you expect from yourself in general. They’re your ceiling in life. If you’re depressed, so are your general expectations; if you’re optimistic and thriving, your general expectations will be high. In the simplest terms, having high general expectations means you’re optimistic, but this doesn’t apply to any specific scenario or event. Having lower general expectations is a problem not because it forms a ceiling you can’t surpass but because you won’t try to surpass it.