The Chaos of Longing, K.Y. Robinson
K.Y. Robinson

The Chaos of Longing

34 printed pages
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Organized in four sections – Inception, Longing, Chaos, and Epiphany – K.Y. Robinson's debut poetry collection explores what it is to want in spite of trauma, shame, injustice, and mental illness. It is one survivor's powerful testimony, and a love letter «to those who lie awake burning.»
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This is authentic

sometimes i wonder if i’m too much rainfall and not enough sun.

you’ll get used to me

it will not be love
at first sight
when you look at me.
your eyes and heart
must adjust to me.
darkness lives here.

i will not fit perfectly.
you’ll have to break me in
like brand new shoes
and i will pinch you
with every step.

i will grow on you
like weeds
in an untended garden.
you’ll yank me out
in hopes that something
beautiful will sprout
in my place
but it never does.

i will slowly seep
into the floorboards
of your heart
until they squeak
and buckle.
this will be your new home
and you cannot afford to leave.
i won’t let you
loved me
when i was being
that’s when i learned
i had to tempt chaos
to feel loved.
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