codependent person is one who has let another person’s behavior affect him or her, and who is obsessed with controlling that person’s behavior.
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
The codependents felt responsible for so much because the people around them felt responsible for so little; they were just taking up the slack
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
It’s more difficult to convince codependents—those who by comparison look, but don’t feel, normal—that they have problems
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
Yet, by its nature, alcoholism and other compulsive disorders turn everyone affected by the illness into victims—people who need help even if they are not drinking, using other drugs, gambling, overeating, or overdoing a compulsion
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
and continue giving to this bottomless pit of unmet needs we called a marriage. I was sick of shouldering the burden and feeling responsible for the success or failure of the relationship. It’s his problem, I railed silently. Let him find his solution. Leave me out of this. Don’t ask another thing of me. Just make him better, and I’ll feel better.
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
I flashed him daggers, forced a smile, and said, “My day was okay. Thanks for asking.”
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
Relationships are like a dance, with visible energy racing back and forth between the partners. Some relationships are the slow, dark dance of death.1
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
codependency is primarily a reactionary process. Codependents are reactionaries. They overreact. They under-react. But rarely do they act. They react to the problems, pains, lives, and behaviors of others. They react to their own problems, pains, and behaviors.
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
We frequently react to people who are destroying themselves; we react by learning to destroy ourselves
Кристина Байдебураhas quotedlast year
feel ashamed of who they are. think their lives aren’t worth living. try to help other people live their lives instead