Chapter 1
-Trust Me; I’m a Vampire
Okay, so I am a vampire; so what? Yes, I do bite, so just shut up, human readers, and listen, or you will discover just how sharp my fangs are.
Look, I’m not undead, but I am not human, either; I’m just a girl that happens to have better teeth than you do. I am a living vampire, so not dead (with or without a “un,” okay)? You didn’t know that there were real living vampires? Well, that is not my fault, so try and not tell everyone of your ignorance, as my auntie always says; let people think you are an idiot without opening your mouth and proving it to them.