Her Big Secret

So, all alone I staggered through the after effects called post abortion stress. Fractured. Defrauded. Hurting. And hiding it all. Many other young women have walked my road. They are the women that are all around us. They come in all sizes, shapes, ages, countries, nationalities and religions. In fact, one statistic sites that “by the age of forty five one in every two and a half women around us have had an abortion”. (jilly 2011) They are the women standing next to us in line at Panera. At the post office. At the grocery store. Perhaps on a more personal level they are the women that sit next to us at work. At church. Or, on the bus. They may be our neighbors, our friends, or our cousins. They may be our nieces, our daughters, and even our mothers.

Girls, guys, moms, dads, sisters and brothers. You have been affected by the experience of abortion, either directly or indirectly. This is for you. Maybe you personally did not have an abortion, but someone close to you made the choice to have one as I did. Many times we are left wondering how to pick up the scattered pieces of our soul. Sometimes it happens so quickly and easily that we are left wondering what just happened. Do you feel like there is a missing link? A misplaced piece?

Is there something you are feeling on the inside of you that feels dishonored? Maybe even violated? Or maybe you can’t put your finger on it but you know there is something holding you back from feeling superb? Some of us need a good cleansing to release the pain. The kind of cleansing you feel after a good cry. When life starts to feel like a pressure cooker and you just know that “if I let it all out I will feel better”! If deep down on the inside of you there are feelings and issues you think maybe haven’t been completely resolved or maybe you wonder if there is a way to understand what you are feeling, this message is for you.

Do you feel like you have closed that chapter of your life and moved on, but wonder why you feel depressed or sad, particularly when certain events trigger the memory? Do you avoid the topic of abortion because it is too painful for you? My hope is that we allow this book to help us recognize and understand some of the effects of post abortion stress syndrome, P.A.S.S. (a fancy word for unresolved pain!).

You owe it to yourself to STOP for a minute. Put the distractions of life on hold for a moment. Find time in a busy schedule long enough to focus on you. You are important. Think about your life. Slow down to speed up. A good cleansing is coming! This book reflects the healing of my life. It will help post-abortive women who have suffered silently. Abortion is a severely traumatic event. Its effects on us are very similar to post traumatic stress disorder (PSTD). PTSD can be defined as a mild to acute disorder which can occur when a person has been exposed to a traumatic event. The event would have involved a perceived or actual threat to the person’s own life or physical integrity or that of another, such as a physical or sexual assault, rape, a serious accident, a natural disaster, combat, being taken hostage, torture, displacement as a refugee, sudden unexpected death of a loved one, and witnessing a traumatic event. (Rachel Yehuda, PHD N Engl J of Med Vol. 346, No. 2 – January 10, 2002).