Black Swans

And fiction got through to me where facts had feared to tread.

Because self-enchantment has nothing to do with upkeep or tradition or loyalty or museums. That Hollywood is tawdry, that people who expect others to worship them are unsubtle and low class, that publicity seekers deserve to be ridiculed—these are not new ideas. They have always been Hollywood’s loose ends, even in the dream 1920s, when the place itself was still paradise. Perhaps Hollywood’s one hundredth anniversary should be a celebration of the art of publicity. But public relations has always been regarded as the world’s most revolting profession, causing many publicists to try and keep a low profile, so nobody’s going to think that’s a good idea. Publicists, after all, aren’t here to make themselves enchanted, and if they are seen by most people as lily-livered coyotes, that’s their Karmic predicament.

We live in a world where whoever sedates us with the most glamour and captures our imaginations with the greatest intensity becomes history. And if Julio Iglesias knows that paying a publicist millions of dollars is what it takes to span the bridge between being an unknown millionaire Latin hero and being Willie Nelson’s pal on TV, then the self-enchanted, at least, know whose anniversary this is.

Hollywood is a fiction that happened, a tornado of fabrication, a comedy of publicity. It’s as tenuous today as it’s always been, but it’s still standing. Whatever it is, it’s not over. Not yet

And having grown up in Hollywood, I’ve known a lot of self-enchanted people. Not since the pharaohs thought they were gods have so many human beings believed that they themselves (and not their publicists or destiny or some larger force) were responsible for the fact that so many other human beings worshiped them.

“I stood outside that window in the dark

God, jealousy sure is a mad dog from hell with rabies

when we thought how you behaved was the fault of other people.
The dictionary I own does not define jealousy as pain. It uses words like “resentment,” “envy,” “mental uneasiness from suspicion,” and the effete “mood

when we thought how you behaved was the fault of other people

It’s only temporary: you either die, or get better

beauty without a whisper of fading, sagging, or wrinkling, although real girls do age, of course, no matter how self-enchanted they are. And age is a disaster

Eve is still fighting back against those that would tell her how to write, what to write about, and how to spend her days