Breasts and Eggs

“Maybe I’m just weak,” she said, smiling faintly. “But I can never accept life. Not if I want to go on living.”

We’re all so small, and have such little time, unable to envision the majority of the world.

My life was like a dusty shelf in an old bookstore, where every volume was exactly where it had been for ages

My life was like a dusty shelf in an old bookstore, where every volume was exactly where it had been for ages

Once they’ve had a baby, most parents would do anything to shelter them from any form of pain or suffering. But here it is, the only way to actually keep your child from ever knowing pain. Don’t have them in the first place.

“If you want a kid, there’s no need to get wrapped up in a man’s desire,” Rika declared. “There’s no need to involve women’s desire, either. There’s no need to get physical. All you need is the will, the will of a woman. If Natsu makes up her mind to take that child in her arms, to always be there for them, thick and thin, that’s all that matters. Really, it’s a good time to be alive.”

“You’re very kind,” he said quietly.

“No one’s ever said that to me before.”

“Really?”

“Really,” I said, thinking it over. “Yeah, I’m sure of it. Not even once.”

“How’s that possible?” Aizawa laughed.

“What do you mean?”

“I wonder if maybe you’re so kind that no one’s ever noticed.”

“What do you mean?”

“This happens with all kinds of things, not just kindness. It’s like people only pick up on things when they’re somewhere in the middle, not too strong, not too weak.”

“But you caught on?” I smiled.

“Exactly,” Aizawa laughed. “Maybe this is a very special day. The day that someone finally understood how kind you truly are.”

I was just a kid, but I really thought I was protecting my mom from my dad. I was so wrong. She wasn’t putting up with him at all. She never wanted to leave. She never wanted to fight. Leaving him had never even occurred to her. She just smiled at us, her kids, and said: He’s the only one for me.”

I wanted to speak up and ask the woman whether she thought there was any form of childbirth that did not involve the egos of the parents, but I decided against it.

Naruse meant everything to me. I wanted us to be together. I could see us decades down the road, talking about all kinds of things and going all kinds of places. I wanted us to build a life together. But sex with him was not something I needed—not something I wanted.