DIARY OF AN OXYGEN THIEF By Anonymous (The Oxygen Thief Diaries)

they'd spent all their money bringing me over to this fine country and they wanted me working on BNFUCKINV.

she squeezed out the following words in a voice at least three times higher than her IQ, “Hi Jimmy, I'm just lying here toasting my buns. Wanna come flip me over?”

could still be bitten on the face.

You innocently open your windows in the hope that a breath of a wisp of a breeze
of a wind will exhale itself into the airlessness that has become your life

At one point, I would resist even making a joke with my small circle of AA friends, because I feared the waste of creative energy would usurp my bank and I'd be depleted when BNV came to make yet another withdrawal.

Funny that, when things are dodgy and I don't like the way they're going, I move into just-for-today mode.

if I were miscast in my own life

I saw someone across the street who did the things to me that I routinely do to me I’d run in the opposite direction. But I can’t, can I?
I’m married to me.

fully accept that a lot of what I'm saying is paranoia. Everything that follows could well be my own imaginings and totally unfounded. I mean, the actual facts and figures are true. Dates, salaries, locations, awards, etc… But the motivations and emotions of the people surrounding those solids are smoke.

had so much scary work to do. People to impress. Apartments to see, ideas to generate. I had a strong sense that the world and its inhabitants were trying not to burst out laughing in my face.