The Art of Everyday Assertiveness

Right from the outset, you might feel that you’re becoming someone that’s mean and “not nice.” But that’s because your definition of “nice” has become skewed over the years.

Being less nice (and even aggressive, as studies have shown) is paramount to happiness and getting what you want.

The power to live as you want is within your hands, not to be dictated by the acceptance or tolerance of the people around you.

They are certainty, variety, significance, love and connection, growth, and contribution. This is what’s at stake every time you come to a fork in the road and consider shrinking away from the moment.

Tony Robbins succinctly articulated the six needs of human happiness

You can’t control what others do or how they might respond to you, but you can control your own behavior.

Just because you have an ability or skill doesn’t mean other people are privileged to it.

If you don’t want to attend an event because you want to spend quality time with your dog, that’s valid and no one can judge.

actions or phrases you have been afraid of using for fear of seeming flakey, selfish, rude, or stupid are actually your rights. They are the key to being assertive because they give you permission to act as your authentic self, guilt-free. And again, they might feel “not nice”—but that’s because your definition of “nice” needs to change!

Being assertive is understanding that you can’t control what others may do, but you can control your own behavior.