The Opposite of Hate

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“A stunning debut by a truly gifted writer--an eye-opening read for both liberals and conservatives—and it could not come at a better time.”--Adam Grant, New York Times bestselling author of Option B, with Sheryl Sandberg, and Originals
CNN’s Sally Kohn has a talent for making friends across the political aisle. While establishing herself as a leading progressive voice as a commentator on Fox News, she went head-to-head with her colleagues on divisive issues, engaging in heated arguments but also developing unexpected friendships. But since the 2016 election and the epidemic of hate that surrounded it, Kohn began to wonder: Where did all this hate come from and how can we get beyond it?
Drawing upon cutting-edge research from psychology, sociology, and the neurosciences, and from examples in history and even today’s twitter trolls, Kohn uncovers the evolutionary and cultural roots of hate in its most subtle and obvious forms--from implicit bias to racism to genocide. She travels across the country and worldwide for exclusive interviews with fascinating and inspiring people who have left hate behind, including a former white supremacist who is now a practicing Buddhist and a former Palestinian terrorist who now works with Israelis to forge understanding and peace. With her trademark humor, intelligence, and wit, Kohn boldly confronts her own prejudices and suggests that we all share some responsibility. She offers concrete tools for combating the crisis of hate sweeping our nation, showing readers the power of connection and our shared humanity.
At a moment when bitter partisan politics have divided Americans, The Opposite of Hate is a thought-provoking and ultimately hopeful look at one of the most pressing issues of our time.

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315 printed pages

Quotes

forgetenothas quoted5 years ago
My first real project as a community organizer was helping LGBT employees in businesses and government agencies lobby their employers to create domestic partnership benefits plans—so that LGBT employees could include their partners on their health insurance and other workplace benefits. This wasn’t something individuals could do alone—they couldn’t just, one by one, create exceptions to corporate and government policies. But when they came together to press their case, employees were able to win change. Those victories were important, but even they were limited to one employer at a time. One of the many reasons to push for marriage equality was to achieve equal benefits not just company by company, or local government by local government, but all at once, for everyone. But that took even more people pushing.

Community organizing is premised on the belief that collective problems can be solved only through collective action that pushes for collective solutions. The solutions throughout this book—connection-speech, connection-spaces, and connection-thinking—get us part of the way toward the opposite of hate, but we also need big-picture solutions that broadly change policies, institutions, and cultural norms. That’s where “connection-systems” come in. We need to enact laws and institutional practices—and promote social and cultural norms more broadly—that recognize we’re all fundamentally equal and, at the same time, help us respect and relate to each other’s differences.
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forgetenothas quoted5 years ago
Those of us who aren’t subject to biased mistreatment often rationalize mistreatment as justified.
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forgetenothas quoted5 years ago
I tried to contact more than a dozen trolls, including all of my worst offenders, and I heard back from about half.
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