What is the difference between thongs and flip flops? To a Brit, flip flops are worn in the summer to the beach. To an Australian, thongs are all-purpose, all-terrain footwear worn 365 days a year. If they could climb mountains, fight fires in their thongs, they would give it a damn good go. True stories you just never hear! Covering over thirty years from my service in the British Army to migrating to Australia and becoming an underground coal mine worker. 'You're not all coming home speech' prior to Gulf War 2. OCD is rife in the British Army. The clown on parade and meeting a soldier called 'Git'. The 'Duaringa Incident'; two idiots stuck on a railway line. Bolts not boats! Smelly passengers, workmates and sanitary issues within a coal mine. My turbulent relationship with the Australian wildlife, especially Skippy; once love, but now so bitterly estranged. How did it go so wrong?