Diary of a Wimpy Vampire

Timing is everything in the eternal dance of seduction.

I wanted nothing more than to lie in bed today and think about Chloe and her pretty neck.

I wondered what further punishment life could have in store for me.

Oh that’s right, I forgot, no one ever cares about anything I do.

Too late, world. You should have appreciated me when you had the chance.

You might have won this one, little fiend. But I shall never forget this mistreatment.

No, I have no choice but to navigate this eternal river of loneliness in a boat of solitude.

I do know what I’m missing - the point of existence.

MY LOVE HAS BEEN STOLEN

My love has been stolen

And I am in hell

Now in my heart

Nightmares doth dwell.

My love has been stolen

Am I am in grief

How could she forsake me

For a boy with bad teeth?

Even that old fleabag considers me persona non grata.