First Love

. In Zinaida’s absence I pined: I could not concentrate: I could not do the simplest thing. For whole days I did nothing but think intensely about her. I pined away, but her presence brought me no relie

‘Take what you can yourself, and don’t let others get you into their hands; to belong to oneself, that is the whole thing in life,’

‘Take what you can yourself, and don’t let others get you into their hands; to belong to oneself, that is the whole thing in life,’

I sat quite still, hardly looking round, and breathing very slowly; only from time to time I laughed silently at some memory, or grew cold at the thought that I was in love – it was here – this was love.

Your word is law

‘And here I am sitting opposite her,’ I was thinking, ‘I have met her; I know her. God, what happiness!’ I almost leapt from my chair in ecstasy, but in fact I only swung my legs a little, like a child enjoying a sweet. I was as happy as a fish in water. I could have stayed in that room – I could have remained in it for ever.

It seemed to me that I had known her for a long time, and that before her I had known nothing and had not lived…

(the silver sound of her voice ran through me with a sort of sweet shiver).

(the silver sound of her voice ran through me with a sort of sweet shiver).

My blood was in a ferment within me, my heart was full of longing, sweetly and foolishly; I was all expectancy and wonder;